Nige 54 - The Column August 2004 Yes that's right - it's the games of the XXVIII Olympiad and we all know what that means don't we - gold medals, world records and one of THE greatest shagging fests of all time! Just think...how awesome would it be to be an athlete staying at the Olympic Village in Athens surrounded by so many top class babes? Once your event is complete and you've picked up a gold medal or two, the only thing left to do would be to party your backside off by hunting down the abundance of well manicured pussies on offer from all over the world. Everyone would be banging everyone and ALL of the babes (except for perhaps the Hungarian weightlifters and Bulgarian shot putters) are 100% pure quality. Rumour has it that the swim teams are the greatest shaggers of all because their events are over after the first week so they have the whole second week to see how many foreign babes they can score. I'm sure the babes from the water polo team love getting it on, the gymnastics team is probably a little young but still an option if over eighteen, while the athletics team have to unfortunately restrict their partying because their events do not conclude until the end of the second week. However, this won't be the case for Jana Pittman who, as the result of a so called "freak accident" (the latest mail suggested that this "accident" happened off the track), now has the opportunity to win more gold than ever before and really do her country proud by partying for the full two weeks - not sure how many guys would be willing participants though! Overall, the opportunities must be endless and I imagine that there must stories out there of some truly legendary performances, unbelievable orgies and some first class bed hopping. I would love to hear reports from any of our past or present Olympic athletes in relation to the amount of babes they are pounding and how many flags they are able to score during the next two weeks - now that's the medal tally that really counts! But for us back home, we still have to do our bit to support the Aussies, so I pose the question - "How many gold medals will you win over the next two weeks?" Mailman, over here! Nigester What are you views on writing text messages to babes? My mates and I think it is a great ice breaker and even good for asking girls out on dates. What are your thoughts? Colin - Palm Beach, New South Wales Colin, May I make this very clear - text messaging is for losers! The only time text messaging may be beneficial is to perhaps send someone the address of the nightclub you are at because you can not hear them over the music. In all other instances and ESPECIALLY in relation to dating or chasing chicks, text messaging is always the move reserved for the untalented and the insecure. Also, you think that text messaging it is a good ice breaker??? Mate, that may be the case in 1% of situations but you ask any quality girl how she feels about being communicated to via text a few nights after a guy takes her number and she will almost always say that it shows that guy has zero class. So don't be that guy. Pick up the phone and make the call - otherwise you will never be taken seriously. Nigester Nige 54 In your July column you mentioned that Amy Smart is the celebrity you would most like to marry. But seriously...with this website being such a promotion of the single life aren't you against marriage? Will you ever settle down? Emily - Brighton, Victoria Emily, Yes, I can see why you would ask that question. It is a question I will gladly answer, however, after you have read my thoughts don't forget to flick to the last chapter of "Around The World In 80 Babes!" to see that I can walk the walk and am not just tickling your clitoris. In terms of marriage I am all for it. I think it is a sensational part of life's journey and personally I am looking forward to it and the joys and challenges it brings. But, and this is the big but, I firmly believe that if you have not met the right person then you should NOT be getting married - 100% of the divorced population is testament to that. Therefore, if you have not met the right person, you might as well go out and have the time of your life - and in-steps The Nigester, my book and this website. Without blowing my own trumpet, the fact is that I am one of the best when it comes to having the best time with the hottest chicks especially when they are all nude. I see so many guys at the bar who seem lost, unsure and not knowing how to make the first move let alone seal the deal. I honestly hope that I can assist in this way and if my stories and life experiences, at the very least, can inspire men of all types and backgrounds to get out there, open their minds and bang hot international babes (rather than the typical crackwhores from the local pub who many ultimately marry) before the responsibilities of life settle in, then I think we will all be better off. We all know that life is too short, let alone your prime years and my advice is aimed at helping guys (and babes too!) to maximise their single life so when the situation presents itself you can make the best decision possible when choosing your ultimate babe to be your wife. Keep the dream alive! Nige 54 Nigester I have just finished reading "Around The World In 80 Babes!" and I just LOVED the Bournemouth Trifecta story in Chapter Eight. I wish that would happen to me whenever I went to "Elements!" Anyway, I was just wondering - are there actual "rules" you live by? Alex - Bournemouth, U.K. P.S. If you ever come back to Bournemouth, drop me a line as I would be honoured to party with the king! Alex, "Elements" really is a sensational nightclub isn't it? I hope it is still pumping like it used to be back in 2000/2001 and if I am ever back in Bournemouth, perhaps I will take you up on your offer as I could do with a "partner in crime" to show me the new haunts in Bournemouth - the official "nightclub capital of Europe". Now in relation to your question - there are many "rules" that The Nigester lives by and they are all associated with living life to full, having the most energy and achieving the impossible every single day of the week. In terms of chicks, there are again many "rules" but the main one I live by is this, "Never knock back an invitation." Whenever you receive in invitation to any event, party or celebration of any kind always respond in the affirmative and attend. In some cases nothing may happen, but more often than not and especially if you are being introduced to a new group of people always go because in most cases, there are going to be hot chicks to meet. Also, this rule applies to every day situations because women can be strange creatures at times and will ring you at the most inconvenient moments with a request to "catch up". Again, no matter how shit you are feeling or how inconvenient the timing may seem always accept the invitation as she'll probably want some action. If she ends up being a cock tease then at least you know for next time, but in the first instance, NEVER knock back an invitation because, and especially with the mega babes, they will only give you one chance. Nigester Email: nige54@nige54.com