Nige 54: The Media

Nige 54 - The Column

February 2005

Nigeoholics!

Now, I was going to begin this month's column by commenting on how well Lleyton Hewitt - the No. 2 ranked tennis player in the world - had recovered from his semi-recent break up with Kim Clijsters, as back in the November 2004 column I spoke about the importance of Lleyton capitalising on who he is, the money he has and the kind of hot babes he can attract. Lleyton must have read my column because he scored himself the 'Home & Away' soap star and mega babe in Bec Cartwright. I doubt that there have been few better recoveries.

However - and this is the big however - only a few hours after losing the Australian Open Final, Lleyton gets down on one knee and proposes to Bec Cartwright after only seven weeks. Lleyton, Lleyton, Lleyton! Mate, there was no need to do that!! Just because you think that Bec is the greatest girl you will ever score considering your average looks, this does not mean you have to go ahead and remove yourself from the dating market. You are forgetting that for superstars like yourself, the world is laced with mega babes from every country just dying to get you naked and being so young, rich and famous, NOW is the time to go out and experience all of this plus ten times more. Remember, Andre Agassi got married to Brooke Shields back in 1997 because he too forgot that tennis stars do not need to 'lock down' mega babes via marriage and look what it did to his career at that time.

What both Lleyton (twenty-three) and Bec (twenty-one) fail to realise is that they are at the age where now is the time to really experience life in every sense of the word and not to rush off to the alter when both of you have the most amazing lives ahead whether or not you stay together. Lleyton, your engagement to Bec is the worst decision since Tara Reid while preparing for P. Diddy's 35th birthday party said, "I think I'll wear the loose fitting black number tonight." Unfortunately, the unravelling of this relationship is just a matter of time.

On a more humorous note, for those that tuned into 90.7 SYN FM a few weeks ago you would have heard my hilarious interview with the guys from the 'Cracker Fat' radio show. For those who missed it, you can download highlights of the interview from my homepage.

Oh and for those sporting buffs, I must tell you that while flicking through the channels the other night I stumbled upon ESPN which was showing the women's college gymnastics that featured Louisiana State vs. Alabama University. Unlike at the Olympics or World Championships, all of these babes were between the ages of 18 and 24, were breathtakingly hot and all have the most awesome bodies. Possibly the best gymnastics competition EVER! But I have no idea who won.

More importantly, in approximately one months time all of these flexible babes will be on Spring Break...man, Spring Break with gymnastic chicks...could it get any better than stumbling across a group of these babes in Miami or Panama City Beach? Infact that kind of scenario does remind me of last year when at a bar in New York I meet a bunch of babes who had just finished competing in a cheerleading comp - but that's another story...

Mail me!

Nigester,

It's coming up to my 21st birthday and my hot babe girlfriend has rigged up two hot babe friends for a special banging session. Is three too many for one evening? I bet you have had more?

Dave - Manchester, U.K.

Dave,

Firstly, may I say that you are a VERY lucky bastard because as 21st presents go, a foursome involving yourself and three babes is clearly the ultimate.

Even I have not been presented with or been able to create the situation of three hot babes at the one time so you will be venturing into those rare waters that even 'The Nigester' has not journeyed. But let me still give you some very important advice from the threesomes I have had - make sure you are able to keep all of the girls interested and involved at all times. I talk about this in Chapter 2 of 'Around The World In 80 Babes!' as it is vitally important that you share the love at all times. And get ready because with such a smorgasbord of things to do, it is going to be hard work. This is a sentiment shared by an American buddy of mine I partied with in Rio De Janeiro last year. While I was in the process of closing a deal with a hot American lass, he was literally kidnapped by three Brazilian babes, thrown in a taxi and banged all night long. He returned the next morning struggling to speak. Later in the day when he managed to put a few words together he stated that while his evening was total euphoria, it left him bloody exhausted.

Dave, it is without saying that these babes you speak of must all be hot and are keen to enjoy each other's company as well as your own. If not, then you might be wasting your time. However, as long as there is an overall good standard of babes involved, then you are without doubt in for the night of your life and will be the envy of every one of your friends until the end of time.

Now, let me ask you...what kind of girlfriend thinks up a 21st present like that??? If you're not bullshitting me then I will now stand, pause and give you a solid golf clap - something I do only rarely.

Brilliant play my man and make sure you do us proud!

Nigester

P.S. Any photographic evidence of this sensational occasion will be welcomed.

Nige,

Why is it that the guy I am banging feels that it is ok to have sex with up to three girls a week? Why does he need to?

Nikki - Preston, Victoria.

Nikki,

Are you really with a guy that is banging three chicks a week? Let's face it, he is probably bullshitting you because no real player doing that would happily admit it to you.

But most importantly, while the reasons behind this guy saying this to you are weird enough, the fact is that you are clearly not inspiring him and I know this sounds simplistic, but just like the new book written by Greg Behrendt & Liz Tuccillo says, the reason he is banging other chicks besides you is because, "He's Just Not That Into You."

Speaking of books and I know that this is a little off the subject, but after mentioning the sensational book I was deeply enthralled in last month, I have been asked to name my Top 5 books - that is the Top 5 besides 'Around The World In 80 Babes!'

Ok, back to the question and for you Nikki, perhaps it is back to the drawing board as you need to focus on what is important - that being YOU. Remove the emotion and the fucked up reasons why you are banging this guy and you will realise that it is not that hard to work out what your next move should be...have you worked it out yet? Ok, I will spell it out for you.

Nikki, any self respecting babe does not continue to have sex with a guy that is 'clearly not into her' while boasting he is banging three chicks a week. If he did not tell you and you found out another way weeks down the track after he had been playing all three of you, then that would be cool. Unfortunately, that is not the case here.

So instead, hold this 'try-hard' accountable by demanding exclusivity or simply move on.

Or you could simply remain being a crackwhore. Whatever!

Nige

Nige 54

Did you go out a lot in 2004 and what was you pick up ratio like?

Are your strategies changing?

Matt - Stuttgart, Germany

Matt,

Ratios, figures, numbers...buddy, you should know by now that I do not publish my official stats in this forum. However, I thank-you for your question and am happy to say that 2004 was another great year with two major highlight periods - my four week trip overseas to New York, Miami, Rio & L.A. and the spring/summer time in Melbourne. Unfortunately there were no debaucherous German babes like the ones you are probably experiencing, but Melbourne is not as international as say Sydney where, for example, the German babe I hooked up with 2003 was nothing short of amazing.

But in terms of going out throughout 2004, me and the boys just loved it. We went out nearly every weekend and often there were a few mid-week expeditions as well. Interestingly, 2004 saw a move to a greater involvement with the 'Sex and the City' type babes - the early 30s hot career women who just love nudity and know exactly what they want without the bullshit attitude as displayed by the early 20s stuck up princess type. Man, are there some good stories there!

Are my strategies changing? Well Matt I should tell you that when me and the boys go out, we are at the stage in life where - and I know this may come as a bit of surprise - it is not all about getting naked and I suppose that is a change of strategy. Sure, we excel at picking up babes and if we see something we like we will always go for it, but compared to the guys who arrive at a bar or club and hunt all night, we prefer to enjoy each others company while creating the environment where girls want to be a part of our group. Then it is much easier to begin the process.

As always though it is horses for courses. Some nights will be a total rampage while others will be pretty chilled. But whichever the case, these days it is all about minimum input for maximum results.

Read that carefully - minimum input for maximum results.

That's the sign of a master at work. So graduate yourself into that mindset and make 2005 yours.

Nige 54

Email: nige54@nige54.com