Nige 54 - The Column July 2004 You know a lot of people ask me why I think American girls are so hot and soooo awesome and in response I often refer back to my many experiences with these horny American babes. Yet even though I tell these stories with great flare and can even throw in some photographic proof, I have always said that you can never really understand exactly what I am talking about until you actually go overseas and see these babes in action first hand. Well that was until now...by switching onto the World Wrestling Entertainment's weekly showing of "RAW" you can now see the highlights from the "RAW Diva Search". Vince McMahon is jumping into the foray of reality TV by searching the United States of America for the WWE's next Diva. They have held preliminary try-outs in New York, Chicago and L.A. where the finalists will move onto New York before the judges select the final ten. The audience will then take control and each week they will vote off these girls one by one until the new Diva is crowned. Now, at this point in time the WWE is only in the preliminary rounds of this competition but the babes are just ridiculously amazing! Even I, with all of my American experiences, was still blown away by the quality of these girls and I have no idea how the judges have been able to eliminate a vast number of these delicious babes. So guys, check it out! Go to www.divasearch.wwe.com or even better, check out the action live on T.V. In Australia "RAW" screens on Fridays at 9.30pm on FOX 8 and is replayed the following day at 12 noon. I'm sure it will become your favourite time of the week as it has easily become mine - well that is except for the other night that I spent in a heated embrace with this French babe who was visiting Melbourne for the weekend...but that's another story! Mailbag please! Nigester Do you ever get bored with it? The reason I ask this is because I am currently in Rome as the leader of a Contiki tour and I am getting HEAPS of action with variety of horny babes, but I really think I am "over it". What about you? Tim - Rome, Italy Tim! We need to have words!!! You're telling me that you are living an absolutely fantastic existence taking busloads of hot and horny babes around Europe and you are "over it"??!! Well let me just say that you need a serious reality check and the key word here is to "re-assess". Tim, you have obviously forgotten how boring "the real world" can be and now is your time to be living it to the full. There is no time for boredom and remember that your ability to bang hot chicks will never be as great for you as it is now. Tim - wake up! I believe I touch on this point a number of times in "Around The World in 80 Babes!", so let me remind you that the reason you are feeling bored is probably because you are not lifting your standards and are not banging the true mega babes and porn queens that cross your path. Maybe you don't even know how to spot them? Whichever the case, I think that you are simply taking advantage of drunk babes and using your status as the leader of the tour to your advantage. That's fine, of course, but you should be focusing on the mega babes who are perhaps a little out of your league - and perhaps this is where you might be risking rejection, which would be your greatest fear considering you have had so much success. So Tim, unless you face this fear you will never realise your full potential and you will regret that in the years to come. It is therefore time for you to "raise the bar" and step into the unknown...and take it from me, when you start scoring the really hot babes, you will NEVER be bored ever again. In relation to me, well how could I ever get bored with success? I love hot babes, I love the things they do whilst naked and I love being a major part of that. Sure, Melbourne is a little slow at times because it is very much a "relationship city" compared to the goldmines of Sydney, Los Angeles and London, but that just means I have to be a little smarter to be able to locate the diamonds in the rough - as do you. Lift your game! The Nigester Nigester, These columns just crack me up! I love your work but here's a challenging question for you...... How do I pick up at a strip club? Lanard - Essendon, Victoria Hey Lanard, Like, come on! I thought answering the question "How to pick up a hot barmaid?" was tough enough back in my April column but now you are asking me this??? Well you are lucky that I have the answer - heh, heh, heh. The key to remember here is your objective for the evening. Do you really think the opportunity will arise whereby one of the dancers will leave with you? Or is your objective to make a great impression and have one of the dancers give you her real name and phone number? Considering the girl is working I doubt she will have the opportunity to leave with you and I don't think they are allowed as I'm pretty sure they can get sacked if they are seen leaving with the customers. So if we agree that the objective is to find out a dancer's real name and getting her phone number then this is the way to go about it: Firstly, make sure you go to a strip club on a quiet night because the girls are too busy on the weekends. A Tuesday or Wednesday night is perfect. Contrary to my advice in Chapter Four of "Around The World In 80 Babes!", offer to buy her a drink. By doing so, you will have the opportunity to have a proper conversation with her. If you get this far you will now have to offer something really attractive because these chicks have been entertained by far wealthier guys than you - they get offers every night and really have heard it all. Therefore you have to come across as honest, perhaps a little intriguing and genuinely interested in who she is. All of these girls have a story to tell so take the time to listen rather than telling them how fantastic you think you are. Even on the quiet nights, you will not have a lot of time, so once you've played your best hand, suggest you continue the conversation another time and that you'll need her phone number to make it happen. If you want to have a dance with her, be warned that she probably won't date you because she will have then shown you everything. You have to highlight that you are interested in her for who she is and not her body and that is what will pique her interest. The way you choose to convey that is up to you because everyone has their own style. While this all may seem a bit far fetched, remember that for these babes, working at the strip club is usually their only time to go out - so where else are they going to meet guys? Some of them will be banging the bouncers or the barmen, but most will be opportunistic babes who are looking for stability so if you can find the right leverage, then you're on your way. Also remember that the key to selecting the right kind of stripper depends on your ability to select the right kind of strip club. The upper class clubs will usually hire women with more class, a greater degree of intelligence and a much cleaner lifestyle than the seedy establishments that employ women whose motives and lifestyle are perhaps very questionable. If you can make this distinction you might actually find yourself striking up a conversation with a babe who is dancing to pay her way through law school. I know this may seem very strategic but let me tell you that I have dated a couple of dancers and yes, they were sensational women, phenomenal in bed and well worth the effort. Woohoo! All the best, The Nigester Nigester, Which celebrity would you most like to marry? Matt - Toronto, Canada Matt, It's funny you ask this question because it is something I have actually thought about and my thoughts are as follows... I met Trish Stratus from the WWE earlier this year and she is just sensational but surprisingly I found her behind to be a little disappointing up close. I have always had a thing for babes like Sarah Michelle Gellar and Carmen Electra but they are now both hooked up and not exactly my type because Sarah's probably a little short while Carmen's been with guys like Dennis Rodman so how could I ever compete with that? I think Jessica Simpson is fantastic but she's married and as is outlined by her husband Nick, she rarely puts out, so even if they did break up, I doubt she could satisfy my desires. Therefore I would have to say that Britney Spears is probably the celebrity that I would most be suited to. She is 100% a "Nigester babe" with her stunning looks, blonde hair and her athletic and very sexy body. She has also only been with a small number of guys so she is probably just about ready to unleash sexually. But, she just hooked up with one of her dancers so unfortunately I'll have to put a line through her. When she comes to her senses I am sure she'll be in touch. So in the meantime who's left? Brooke Burke is married and so is Denise Richards to the world's greatest ever player - Charlie Sheen. Jennifer Love Hewitt, Shannon Elizabeth and Tara Reid are all great babes that I could definitely imagine being naked with, but I couldn't imagine marrying them. But there is one babe who I feel as if she is looking directly at me every time I see her on the screen. Her brief appearances on "Felicity" made that crappy show worth watching, her performance in "Roadtrip" was nothing short of sensational and her recent flicks have included "The Butterfly Effect" and a very sexy appearance in "Starsky & Hutch". She is not the hottest babe on the planet but she's beautiful, she's stunning and above all else she is pure class. Her name is Amy Smart. The Nigester Email: nige54@nige54.com